It comes to me..

Tuesday, January 09, 2018

.. like a violent wave.

I don't know how to better explain it. I suddenly feel so empty. So talentless. So separated from reality. It feels like I'm suddenly thrown into this big mass of nothingness. I want to draw. I draw pretty well lately. But I feel like it's slipping away from me. My skill. All my efforts. I feel like it's being sucked off of me.

This is not because of anything. It's so sudden. And it confuses me because at this moment in time, I am happy but also empty. It's not sadness. It's not anger. It's close to apathy. I can't feel anything. I am emotionally numb. How do you not get numb?

At time like this I desperately search for something material, something physical to stop me from floating away in this shapeless fog. This is why I spend so much money on literally anything. Food, gadgets, games.. But nothing can pin me down.

Please. I need an anchor. Hold me. I don't want to be taken away. Don't let the wave take me away.

Help me.

I can't feel anything.


1 comment:

The way you comment is so telling...


Part time normal, most of the time comic enthusiast. Almost always borderline crazy. Still experimenting with comic blogging. An engineer with a vision to not be taken seriously. Everything you read on this blog doesn't represent my gender, religion or profession as a whole. Other name you might associate with me are Deaday, DayGoon, JaeminGoon and *cough* Mona *cough*